Downsizing New Year’s Resolutions

Photo by Ariel Lustre

Photo by Ariel Lustre

During this time of year, there’s no shortage of tips and advice for how to do better and be better in the New Year. But, resolutions are all too often short-lived. We put so much pressure on ourselves to be perfect every moment and when we inevitably miss a step, we criticize ourselves and give up. This year, my resolutions start with giving myself a break.

At the start of 2017, I made big resolutions ... many resolutions. I was going to finally lose all the weight, eat so cleanly that I only craved vegetables, and become a meditation master. My husband and I were going to travel (A LOT). And I was going to be so productive that I would never procrastinate, I’d read all the books on my list, and I’d be debt free by 2018. Looking at that list could be debilitating because I’ve completed exactly one(ish) resolution on the list and nothing else. BUT, I’ve made a list of what I actually accomplished this year instead. 

1. Said ‘I Do’ to my Love
2. Got out of the house: Created a coworking space with my business partner where people can find connection
3. Traveled to Mexico, Curaçao, and Perú
4. Celebrated the people I love: marriages, births, and life
5. Took baths (sometimes instead of washing the dishes)
6. Read 12 books (some good, some not)
7. Lost (and gained) some weight
8. Made new friends and coworkers
9. Snuggled my cats
10. Toasted the small wins (the first member at Haven, ordering our wedding album, finally washing the dishes, etc)

Looking over this list brings me peace. It’s also led me to realize that I don’t need to make grandiose resolutions that set myself up for failure. This year, I resolve to cut myself some slack, forgive myself daily, and make time for the things that matter most. I resolve to write down what I’m grateful for each day so that I don’t lose track of what brings me joy. Lastly, I resolve to continue making new connections and opening my heart to the people around me.

Danielle Lim